Riffing On Realness™

Social Media and Stress

Episode Summary

No one needs convincing that social media and stress seem to go hand in hand. But does it have to be that way? We explore the parallels between social media and our personal thinking. The pull of social media and how compelling it can be (like our negative thinking) and what might happen if it occurs to us to turn off our phones for a period of time (stop giving attention to our negative thinking).

Episode Notes

Here’s what we explored:-

• social media can be compelling and really exciting for business owners
• Carla and a client came up with an experiment to turn the phone off 6 pm-9 pm
• the client reported finding more creative ideas coming in
• Carla reports sleeping better
• enjoying the last hour of the day with music and stretches also that she hasn't missed anything overnight
• obsessive checking of messages, notifications, and updates can become normal
• the compelling and habitual nature of checking updates is a wonderful metaphor for how we get caught in our personal or negative thinking
• the addictive nature of these platforms was explored in the 2020 film The Social Dilemma
• social media platforms are designed to be addictive and give our brains little hits of dopamine
• turning off all the notifications is a great way to reduce the pull
• it can feel overwhelmingly hard to back off social media consumption
• yet the minute we actually do it, Carla found it easy once she made the commitment
• and it's been an incredible relief
• in the same way thinking can look compelling until we stop giving it attention
• it can feel like we can't detach from it but that is an illusion, also made of thought
• the Power of Thought is a gift - it's what we do with it that creates our experience
• social media is similar - the platforms are an incredible tool for social justice, community building, and change
• AND it can also be a tool for division, oppression, and hate
• it's how we use the tool
• noticing when we are letting social media become the boss of us, running our life
• compulsive mindless fulfilling of the craving is inherently unsatisfying
• brains negativity bias means we're hardwired to grab on to the negative
• in the US it can feel, checking the news is a matter of survival
• yet in the present moment, the two of us, right now, are not in imminent danger
• social media is an echo chamber: it reflects your state of mind back to you
• if you go on Facebook in an irritated state of mind, you'll find most of your newsfeed irritating!
• the algorithms actually work this way too. You get more of the posts you give attention to.
• linger on beautiful wildlife images, you'll get more of those
• linger on posts about economic problems, you'll get more of those
• that's how the mind works and the social media algorithms
• we lose track of ourselves, get disconnected when we're caught in this urgent, compelling scrolling
• we lose access to fresh thought
• we can still stay in touch with news (if we want to), without the need to consume it 24/7
• is social media a gift, giving us a mirror to how our minds work?
• putting the phone down is like leaving our thoughts alone
• the difference between feeling constricted, closed down versus open-hearted, free, feelings can move through
• putting original content into the echo chamber of social media feels like gifting something beautiful
• fresh, authentic, beautiful content that isn't trying to persuade or sell something is one of the things social media can facilitate
• just like the Power of Thought
• the divisive, conflicts that show up on social media, so too we can do that with our own thinking
• do you have social media or does social media have you?
• noticing the tiny, everyday moments of connection available and paying more attention to how nourishing those moments are
• when we're connected with ourselves and others, life becomes relational, not transactional
• we're are all connected. Relationships and connections are what life is all about.
• we are not widgets
• things get out of balance and we can lose track of the importance of connection
• it can get overlooked in the rush for productivity
• the ripple effect of creating something for its own sake, art, poetry, conversation, an excursion to buy just one envelope
• we get to be real with each other
• doing this podcast together is a joy, a chance to connect, to slow down, tune in and listen for our own wisdom
• riffing on what's real, getting curious in a deeper way, about what's beyond our moods
• these things don't show up on a balance sheet, but we know in our hearts that connecting with ourselves and others is important
• maybe we just need to celebrate and honor those moments of connection more, with ourselves and others
• connecting beyond politics, beyond our opinions
• try experimenting, limiting your news and social media time, and see what you discover

Thank you for listening. If you enjoyed this episode, please do leave a review and share on your networks.

Quote/sources

Factfulness: Ten Reasons We're Wrong About The World - And Why Things Are Better Than You Think by Hans Rosling; Ola Rosling; Anna Rosling Rönnlund

The Social Dilemma is a 2020 American docudrama film directed by Jeff Orlowski and written by Orlowski, Davis Coombe, and Vickie Curtis

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Carla is a mindset & performance coach working with high achieving, high-performance entrepreneurs who are dealing quietly with anxiety.

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Poet & 3 Principles facilitator, Juliet loves exploring and pointing towards freedom of mind for those curious to engage more fully with all aspects of their life. 

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